Statistical answers and another Chris Sabo reference

Catcher A: .323 AVG, 2HRs, 14 RBIs, 15 runs
Catcher B: .238 AVG, 1 HRs, 6 RBIs, 7 runs

Catcher A is Los Angeles Dodger Russell Martin. In spite of having looked up his statistics for this post, I'm fairly certain that I still have not heard of him. He did play in 121 games last year, hitting .282 in the process. Catcher B is the more established, and must be great because he plays in New York, Paul Lo Duca.

First Baseman A: .329 AVG, 6HRs, 20 RBIs, 12 runs
First Baseman B: .214 AVG, 3 HRs, 15 RBIs, 9 runs

First baseman A is San Diego Padres emerging star Adrian Gonzalez. He's in the process of following up his 2006 season in which he quietly hit 26 homers to become one of the Padres' best bats. Mr. B happens to be Chicago White Sox superstar Paul Konerko. I'm revoking the "super" and now only referring to him as a star.

Second Baseman A: .333 AVG, 7 HRs, 16 RBIs, 14 runs
Second Baseman B: .243 AVG, 1 HR, 5 RBIs, 12 runs

Ian Kinsler is the stud second baseman with the big pop. I regrettably asked Ed, "Who the hell is this Kinsler guy that Yahoo auto drafted for me?" I suppose I did not complete my homework on that one. The other second baseman was first round VUFSA selection Brian Roberts of the Baltimore Orioles. He is not as good.

Third Baseman A: .385 AVG, 14 HRs, 34 RBIs, 26 runs
Third Baseman B: .233 AVG, 1 HR, 8 RBIS, 9 runs

Third baseman A was actually a trick question, as it's the entire Cincinnati Reds offense. Or Alex Rodriguez. Eli gets the nod with a Chris Sabo reference (goggles!), but in reality the struggling the 3B is second year sensation and also a VUFSA first round pick, Ryan Zimmerman of the really awful Montreal Nationals.

Shortstop A: .298 AVG, 7 HRs, 14 RBIs, 19 runs
Shortstop B: .338 AVG, 1 HR, 8 RBIs, 11 runs

Philly shortstop Jimmy Rollins had the big pop as player A (and added another homer since the original post was typed) in an otherwise inept offense. Miguel Tejada has six fewer homers and 6 fewer RBIs than Rollins.

Outfielder A: .295 AVG, 5 HR, 11 RBIs, 10 runs
Outfielder B: .149 AVG, 1 HR, 6 RBIs, 14 runs
("A" is in the National League; "B" is in the American League)

Josh Hamilton the drug addict no longer is tearing it up in Cincy as outfielder A. Gary Sheffield the broken down guy with the huge swing is outfielder B.

Starting Pitcher A: 3-0, 0.62 ERA, 19 Ks, 0.93 WHIP, 29 Innings
Starting Pitcher B: 1-2, 5.00 ERA, 12Ks, 1.15 WHIP, 27 Innings
(Both National League Pitchers)

Atlanta Brave Tim Hudson is off to the sweltering start, probably thinking he is still in Oakland. Ben Sheets who definitely realizes he's in Milwaukee has tanked after an opening day clinic.

Relief Pitcher A: 0-0, 1.80 ERA, 13 Ks, 7 saves
Relief Pitcher B: 1-2, 7.11 ERA, 7 Ks, 0 saves
(Both American League Closers)

"Awesome" Al Reyes of the Tampa Bay Devil Rays has the best WHIP among all MLB closers. He's also second in the league in saves with 8, a remarkable achievement considering in his eleven year career, he had 6 combined career saves. Mariano Rivera is among the many issues with the might New York Yankees, still looking for that first save of the season.