On the edge

As I waste my evening stooping down to the lower intellectual level of my classmates yet again, I offer you some evidence of why it is I am losing my mind. I present to you the "final" draft of an individual who begins "our" group paper with the following stunning introduction:

"Lester Electronics is a company on the edge. On the edge of ruining the company with a merger to Shang-wa electronics or creating a manufacturing giant."

Photo from Durham-nc.com

Must see mascot brawling

I may have mentioned once that I don't care for Oral Roberts University. Ok twice. So maybe three times. Oh and then there was that one post titled Kinda Smells Like Urine.

As I left work yesterday, I found that Trampoline Bear quitter JR had given me a buzz. A return call was not met with a "hello" or a "how are you?" Rather, the ringing stopped and I was quickly informed, "There's video of Eli the Eagle fighting the IUPUI mascot."

I, of course, could not allow this occasion to pass without posting and mention. The above YouTube video covers the fight as well as comically interviewing a local mascot about the incident. I love sticking a microphone in the face of a man in a giant animal suit that is not able to talk. Great stuff.

Don't be fooled by the local feed or the edited clips, Eli the Eagle is completely to blame here. Word I have is that he shoplifted from a local Walgreens, snatched a ladies' purse, trampled small children, and punched a grandmother celebrating her 95th birthday right in the face. The IUPUI mascot was merely trying to avenge these wrongs and bring this villainous force to justice.

But before I could joyously leap to my computer and post this video clip, I happened upon another (and really there have to be hundreds of them) article blasting my least favorite Oklahoma University.

I'll link to it here, but I'll give you the highlights:

-Writer Steve Warden on the Oral Roberts cheerleaders:
"The word “classless” comes to mind."

-Writer Steve Warden on Oral Roberts in general:
"No wonder several of the Summit League folks I’ve talked with don’t care for Oral Roberts."

-Oakland women's basketball coach Beckie Francis on Oral Roberts University buying the rights to host the tournament and the obvious unfair advantage this creates:
"Quite frankly, I’m sick of being the No. 1 seed and playing on someone else’s court. Last year they closed the school and brought the entire town. It seems a little unfair, and maybe I shouldn’t be saying this, but it feels weird where you’re the No. 1 seed and you’re playing in someone’s backyard."

No, Coach Francis, it's okay. Everyone knows it, and everyone feels it. It's healthy to let it out. Oral Roberts University smells like poo.

Tasty politics

Some time ago, I wrote a piece asking the reading public their thoughts on potentially racist tendencies. As I tend to be, I was ahead of the times bringing forward an interesting question facing today's Democratic candidates. Is it racist to point out trends having to do with race?

Geraldine Ferraro, who Becky informed me was an important person in politics before I started caring about politics and who also makes me think of delicious chocolate (above) that retails at a high price, pointed out that Obama's campaign was successful because he was black.

Is that such a controversial comment? I can see where it is interpreted that black individuals don't care enough about the individual candidates and will only vote on skin color, which makes it borderline at best. On the other hand, is it so wrong to vote for someone that looks like the majority? After all, the Caucasian majority in this country has voted for a Caucasian every single Presidential election.

The problem, of course, is that these are all superficial reasons for voting for someone. And that's pretty stupid in the end. Shouldn't we care more about the message than the color or sex of the one giving the message?

We probably should, but we probably don't.

"As has been the case in many primary states, Obama won overwhelming support from African-American voters. They went for him over Clinton 91-9 percent...But Mississippi white voters overwhelmingly backed the New York senator, supporting her over Obama 72 percent to 21 percent."

This quote from CNN.com and it sure does make it tough to blame Geraldine Ferraro for saying her piece. The numbers sure support what she said, regardless of how hard it may be to hear.

Photo from ShoppingatRediff.com

With .90 degree of certainty, calculate the probability that x is within two standard deviations of the mean

Hello. Remember me?

After six weeks, I have returned. Why the long wait for fresh new Wolfden V material? Simply, you can blame MBA 510 - Managerial Decision Making. As good and arrogant as I am about writing circles around my fellow classmates, calculating statistical answers to in-depth questions quickly levels the playing field. Alas, I persevered and can answer any z-table, t-table, f-table, chi-square, or linear regression questions you may have. I won't guarantee that I will answer them correctly, but I guarantee to answer them. I'm such a math nerd now, that the colorful diagram above of the normal distribution makes sense to me.

The absence from the site caused me to miss out on wonderful topics such as Milwaukee trips, Oral Roberts successes, primary fun, wild Walgreens stories, and more cold weather maps. I'm not going to post "I'll write more soon" because I have no idea how this next class will be and would not want to break hearts in the process. However, I am alive and well and I have not forgotten about you.

Photo from Comfsm.fm

Wide Right! Wide Right! New York Giants Win Super Bowl

It is done. It's over. Everyone go home.

The Super Bowl has wrapped up, but what would one of the greatest upsets in the history of sports be without a small-time blog offering some perspective and reflection? (Rhetorical of course)

Let's start with the game (hosted in my school's stadium...no not Brown Field HA!- The University of Phoenix Stadium in Glendale, Arizona) itself. The low-scoring, defensive minded effort stunned everyone. Any predictions had the Patriots nearing 100 points and those that did pick the Giants had them around 35 to offset the greatest offense in the history of the NFL. Despite both teams scoring on their opening drives, New England and New York barely managed to break 30 points combined.

I confess I was pulling for the Patriots simply for the fact that Belichick used to coach the Browns, and that in turn is the closest my beloved Cleveland franchise has ever been to Super Sunday. Sure he's a poorly dressed, socially deficient cheater, but damn it, he won our last playoff game way back in 1912.

I can't say that I was devastated with the outcome, as I was really more ho-hum than my Belichick allegiance might suggest, but it was disappointing. The wheels had slowly been falling off the New England wagon for some time with those 50 point blowouts from the early weeks of the season becoming a distant memory by the time regular season near losses to Baltimore and New York rounded out the campaign. Come the playoffs, Brady and Company weren't looking as sharp, and finally the rest of the league caught up to them.

The Giants' dominance of the Patriots' offensive line has to be the game storyline. New England could not run the football (Maroney 14 carries 36 yards) and Brady had little time to throw the football. Even when Terrific Tom did have a chance, he looked horrible and far from the 3-time Super Bowl experienced quarterback. He was throwing five feet over receivers' heads on quick outs. Hell, one throw one a deep ball to Moss was so far under thrown that it didn't even land on camera, which is to say nothing of the ball that bounced to a receiver in the first half. I don't know that it was an ankle issue, but Brady looked like I would have expected Eli Manning to have.

Speaking of Lil Eli, he's one lucky QB. I am not at all jumping on the "he won the big game and now he's an elite quarterback" bandwagon. The crap that he was throwing up on that final drive was terrible. Back foot, wobbling ducks throughout the final drive that should have been intercepted about three times over some how, some way fell into the arms of his receivers. That Tyree kid made an exceptional catch, much like Asante Samuel did not. The Giants did have a secret weapon, and it's unquestionably what led them to victory.

Bananas!

A hard hitting sideline report informed viewers that the Giants had a crate of bananas delivered to them at halftime. Fox cameras soon found a bunch of bananas sitting on the bench waiting for consumption. The report revealed that New York was cramping and the potassium rich fruit would save the day.

What the hell? Banana Bowl?

After the game, ESPN covered the game from all angles including Keyshawn Johnson's neck. A boa constrictor (may have been an effeminate scarf) wrapped its body around Johnson neck. If I were the snake, I probably would have slithered toward Emmitt Smith and his subject-verb challenged sentences, but hey, to each their own.

The final segment I saw on Sportscenter had 1972 Miami Dolphin running back Mercury Morris bawling and boasting over the outcome. Look, if I were a member of that team, I would be happy that my record remained unbroken as one of the greatest in sports. But, come on, if it falls it falls. It's been nearly 40 years, and another team sharing the spotlight dampens not the original accomplishment. Clinging a little too hard, Mercury. Time to let it go, man.

Finally, Becky liked the horsie commercials. I preferred the Charlie Brown balloon. Still waiting for Terry Tate's return.


Photo from Dailyillini.com and Neobeans.com

Happy Birthday

Wolfden V is one year old today. To celebrate, I offer you this no doubt delicious dark chocolate (is there any other kind?) cake.

Photo from j and l products.com

When I grow up I want to be a weather man

Oddly enough, Valpo's meteorology program is one of the primary reasons I went to that school. Now, I merely cut and paste colorful pictures revealing obscene temperature swings and brutal cold. Not like there's a Walgreens truck to unload or anything. And it's not like it was freaking 45 degrees the other day.

Images from weather.com