Monday, May 5, 2008

I'm going to say what I need to say

These are slow times at Wolfden V. With Joe Borowski on the DL, I have no goat to pin the blame for the Cleveland Indians' struggles. With a somewhat competent learning team this class at the University of Phoenix, I have no irritatingly ignorant writings to critique. Oh wait, I sorta do.

In high school, I was music crazy. I was all about lists and rankings and whatnot. While many of the lists put Metallica, Nirvana, and Green Day atop whatever musical category I wished to measure, the high school gang did have one other type of list. That list was worst song out there. Now, I must say that the pool of qualifying songs were only those that my beloved 106.7 The End, New Orleans New Rock station played.

Every time a "worst" list came up for any reason, Tal Bachman's "She's So High" topped the chart. I hated and still hate that song. I think it's absolutely horrible, and why it somehow ended up on a rock station is baffling and likely the reason that 106.7 is no longer with us (a hurricane might also have played a small role, too). But Tal Bachman, that one hit wonder, was always the worst. The Beastie Boys threatened with a slew of crap to dethrone Bachman, but not even "Body Movin'" could supplant Tal's big "Ooohhhhhh yeeeeeahhh."

While my musical horizons have been broadened (not much), I frequently listen to the HOT AC format as the station of compromise when driving around with Becky. A nice slew of Goo Goo Dolls and 3 Doors Down mix in with that Fergie chick and the eighteen artists/bands who sound like John Mayer (pictured above being kneed in the groin). It is the latter who now threatens Tal Bachman's place for worst song ever on my radio.

I've never cared for John Mayer. I think he's whiny and horribly superficial with his puffy pop. That said, I've never had a tremendous distaste for him either, as he has a niche and when the rest of the radio is trying to sound like you, clearly you've done something well. He's always just kinda been there. Perhaps the best word I can use to describe him is "eh."

But now, I have something I need to say. And that is that "Say What You Need to Say" is one of the worst songs of all-time. How a song that urges such critically important dialogue manages to say nothing at all is of great quandary. The gist of the song is that Mayer repeats the title non-stop for a grueling 4 minutes. It became such a joke to me and my radio sharing wife that she decided to count just how many times the phrase is repeated.

37 freaking times.

It's as if Mayer isn't even trying to write lyrics. He's laying around his studio too lazy to come up with anything creative and instead got stuck on a potentially good concept only to repeat it a thousand times while thinking of something else to write. This is a guy who's been linked to Jennifer Anniston and Cameron Diaz who are no doubt swept up with his profound take on life. 37 times!

I'm not sure that I'm quite ready to kick Bachman off the lofty perch of most awfulest terriblest song, but if KS 95 insists on continuing to play this crap every time Becky and I are in the car, I may just have to cave in and listen to Becky's country station.

Hmm, on second thought, that's just not going to happen. Ever.

Photo from USA Today


CHCgirl said...

I know it's annoying but it shouldn't take the perch of worst song ever. Yes, 37 times repeated, but you know the other 15 words aren't that bad. I agree he's "eh" but I kind of like the song. In the same way I kind of like CSI:Miami--- it's awful and yet I can't stop watching it.

lonewolf said...

Wait. There are other words?

JR said...

"How Bizarre."

lonewolf said...